Peacenik Fashionista
AKA my momma, Patricia Louise.
“That I loved my children with every bone in my body. That they are perfect just they way they are, with whatever changes they wish to make.” That’s what my mom said when asked what she wanted to be remembered for.
For Mother’s Day I wanted to write about her. Patricia Louise Guerrero. This is a difficult task because she passed away a little over a year ago and the grief is still heavy. To make it lighter, I thought maybe I could talk about her style. She had a kooky - yet very cute personal style. I’m happy to have inherited many things from my mom. But I never would’ve admitted to having inherited a little of her quirky fashion sense. Now that I think about it, I’m so glad I did.
These are the things I picture in my mind when I think about her style: color, colorful socks, socks and sandals, pretty wool sweaters, a bandana tied around her neck, Clare V. t-shirts & sweatshirts, her packed Clare V. crossbody bag, coral lipstick, and lots of necklaces.
She loved thrift store shopping, and was on a first name basis with the shopgirls at her local consignment shop, where she regularly went to sell and buy clothes for herself, kids, and grandkids.
Many years ago I got her a Kathryn Bentley turquoise and gold pendant and I don’t think she ever took it off. She was a Pisces and Irish. Born a day before St. Patrick’s Day, she loved the color green. Anything in that hue - she loved. She usually added either the Clare V. giant pearls or a light blue bead strand that I bought for her in Haiti. She wore 3 rings, a birthstone ring with the stones for each of her 6 kids, an oval-shaped diamond ring set in platinum from her parents, and a purple Amethyst ring, I never knew where it came from, maybe she bought it for herself.
I would’ve liked to ask her about the Amethyst ring.… When someone you love passes away you think about all the things you didn’t get to talk about. It occurred to me writing this - I never asked her how she formed her personal style. Why did she like the clothes she wore? What were some items she would never wear? What made her feel pretty?
I think if I would’ve been able to ask her about her style, she would’ve first said, “Why?” If I’d have responded because I was writing about her style, she’d have said, “Well, why would you want to do that?” And I’d have said, “Because I want to, just tell me, where you got your style?” She’d have said, “I don’t know, I guess I just like what I like.”
But I could be wrong. Maybe she did have more of a philosophy of why she wore what she did, and how it made her feel. In any case, she wouldn’t want to be remembered for her style. She wanted to be remembered for being a peace activist, a social justice warrior, a friend, a concerned citizen. And most importantly, for being a mom and loving her perfect kids with every bone in her body.
Compassion and radical acceptance, my mom’s forever gift to me, something that I will strive for in my journey as a mom, with a continued affection for color!
Happy Mother’s Day to you all.
“I’m so glad you’re here - it makes me realize how beautiful the world is.” Rainer Maria Rilke
“Oh God, help me believe the truth about myself, no matter how beautiful it is.” Unknown
Beautifully written. May her memory be a blessing.
Love your mom- your clear fashion role model.